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The man was wealthy enough that he could easily pay off the debt.
But every once in a while, his wife would figure out something was amiss, so the man would just cut up the secret credit card and open another hidden account. They’re addicted to the drug, and the drug [addiction] just progresses and the expenses get increased.” When excessive spending accompanies out-of-control sexual behavior, it’s critical for a sex addict to face financial reality, says Barbara Winter, a psychologist and sexologist.
This can help a sex addict control the situation by hiding expenses from a spouse who’s “particularly vigilant” about household finances, he says.
Maybe the addict amasses thousands of dollars in charges to cover pricey hotel rendezvous with high-dollar escorts – and to hide these deceitful expenses from a spouse.John Giugliano, a psychotherapist specializing in sex addiction and former president of the Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health (SASH), says the problem is real, but “the name of the problem is controversial and still up for grabs.” He prefers to use the term “out-of-control sexual behavior.” (On his website, Coambs provides tests to help determine whether you’re a sex addict or a money addict.Keep in mind that a professional should make the actual diagnosis.) Giugliano notes that while there’s plenty of research about gambling and credit card debt as well as shopping and credit card debt, there is no research on out-of-control sexual behavior and credit card spending.These trips allow sex addicts to “act out” anonymously and away from home, leading “dual lives,” Coambs says.
Business owners can be especially adept at carrying out these “dual lives,” since they can siphon money from their companies “without anybody really noticing,” Coambs says.
Not only can sexual addiction cause emotional and physical damage, but it also can max out credit cards and sink an addict and his or her family into debt.